Death and faith...or lack thereof

In recent days, my dad passed away.  I have said in a previous post, my Catholic Faith has given me great solace and comfort in its teaching that since Jesus Christ, borne out of His great love for, gave His life to redeem us, frees us from enslavement to sin and death so that when we approach that moment of death we can do so with eternal hope.  My dad had this hope and desperately wanted his children to share in that hope. Because I choose to live the hope that my dad modeled for me and wanted in instill in me by having me baptized, I can approach this moment in time with intense calm and hope.  I proudly live this hertiage my dad sought to pass down to his children.

Yesterday, one of my siblings friends, a person who self-describes herself as a liberal and atheist, posted on my sister's Facebook wall a few words of comfort from her perspective.  I know she meant well in helping her friend deal with the loss of her dad, but I was struck by the hopelessness of those words and how they wanted to drag my sister into that same hopelessness, a hopelessness that my dad would have categorically disagreed with intensely and would have taken great offense that someone was using this opportunity to directly dismiss his own deep held faith with one of his children.  Again, I do not want to say that this person had malicious intent.  This person has her beliefs and in a free society she is entitled to express them.  But as someone who struggled with agnosticism in my early 20's, I can hardly condemn her.

For me, finding my way back to faith was first more an act of logic than faith.  It goes like this:  it is physically impossible for something to come from nothing.  All matter is regulated by the properties of time and space.  Logically, only that which is not bound by these properties has the ability to bring them into being, and hence the created order into existence.  It is called the ex nihilo argument for the existence of God.  That the created order is so well ordered even in the seeming chaos points to an intelligent power bearing responsibility for that created order.  It was for this reason that I could never intellectually accept atheism as a viable or logical reality.  It is not logical.  This left me at a Theist or agnostic state.  That whatever created had any relationship with that creation was another question.  That I struggled with.  I had to reconcile the faith I had studied (that my dad had passed to me) with what I saw in this world.  Why did tragedies happen?  Why did good people suffer?  Having been in the seminary, I saw a lot of activity from clerics that did not jibe with the teachings of the Church...if their knowledge couldn't provoke them to authentically live that faith, why should I then give any credence to that faith?  It was their poor witness paired with me wanting to be unshackled by what seemed an empty morality that led me to be an agnostic for a few years.

A few years went by.  Something ate at me about the worldview I was holding: It was awful convenient to hold what I was holding because it changed to locus of authority from outside myself to being myself.  Morality, hence, was whatever I wanted it to be and I found I rarely challenged myself to be a better person. I knew I was supposed to be a good person.  I was honest and diligent at work, I stepped into a supportive role for my siblings after my parents divorced, but I was slightly promiscuous, incredibly materialistic and not a happy person.  I chain smoked.  I was argumentative.  I had a hair string temper.  I had ulcers.  I was comfortable in my agnosticism on one level, but felt a great abyss of emptiness inside that no money, power, or pleasure could sate.  I remember one night sitting on my deck in Missouri and realizing that there would never be enough money, promotions, toys, sex, or other pleasures to fill what was lacking.  Life became futile and meaningless in that absolutely everything that I was could be taken from me and at best all I could get was temporary relief.  I fought returning to faith because it too had disappointed me.  I refer to that next 6 months as the dark night.  I remembered something from my seminary days, a quote from St Augustine: "our hearts are restless until they rest in you."  My heart was most definitely restless and unfulfilled by the earthly trinkets that surrounded me.  Then I started taking the next logical steps.

What made more sense: that this creator created with or without a reason or purpose?  Logically, it made greater sense that there would be intent and hence reason and purpose.  What made more sense:  that the reasons would be malicious or beneficial?  I remember my dad taking me on hikes when I was 4th grader in Indiana.  He loved the outdoors and would point out while we were walking what kind of tree, plant, bird, animal, or rock I was looking at. He is responsible for my love of nature and the outdoors.  I thought much later in life as to why we call natural disasters 'Acts of God', but we don't refer to newly blooming flower, the beauty of new life, the awesomeness of a mountain range, the splendor of a sunrise, the warmth of friendship, the sounds of a gentle rain, the smell of a spring meadow, the sound of a child's laugh, "acts of God' as well?
The earth was full of beauty both profound and simple and co-existed with the ugliness, suffering, and agonies of life.  However because our bodies and the created order are limited to time and space, we grow old, we get sick, and our bodies cease to function.  However, there was something in me that knew that there was more.  That started me on the road of faith.  I saw the profound difference it made in others and I wanted that for myself.

My dad had every reason to be a bitter man by worldly standards.  He was snatched from his home by DFS as a pre-teen.  He bounced from one horrific foster home to another till my grandparents adopted him.  His 23 year marriage ended badly.  He never got rich.  He never got powerful.  He had an incurable disease in Parkinsons that would eventually make his mind a prisoner of his body.  I could go on and on about how many things he had to endure and the disappointments this life heaped on him, however, as I watched my dad in this last month, I saw a man of deep faith who was full of joy even as his body was turning against him.  In that last month, I witnessed a man at peace with the world, with God, and with himself.  As I sat by his bed with two very good friends and watched him take his last breath, I can not describe adequately the calm and peace of that moment.  Everything inside me told me that all that my dad had hoped and desired in this life, he was  now experiencing.  I'll not allow any atheist to rob me or my family of that moment.  I will not allow them to infuse their hopeless world view into this moment.  This person can believe what she wants, but I choose not to share in such a maudlin worldview or allow my siblings to hear that view unchallenged.  

Anyone who knows me well or has heard me preach knows that our Catholic preaches that we are to be a people who merciful, charitable, kind, forgiving, compassionate, faithful stewards of God's gifts, including the world in which we live, and faithful witnesses of Christ.  When we fail to live to these standards, we give scandal and give ample fuel to those who would dismiss God and faith altogether.  Dad knew this and grew more and more into this and wanted his children to know the fulfillment he felt.  It troubled him that not all did.  I know it troubled him when I didn't.  I know he now prays for his children and grandchildren because he wants us to be with him...he modeled a path...if we are wise we will try to walk on it despite all life throws at us.  I told my dad two things minutes before he passed from this life: I would take care of his dog for as long as Buddy lived and that I would watch out for my brothers and sisters.  I asked him to intercede to help me do these things.

To my sister's friend:  I know you meant well.  You wanted to comfort my sister and I deeply appreciate that.  However she is my dad's daughter first.  Both you and I have made our decisions.  Fair enough.  I introduce a little philosophical nugget known as Pascal's Wager in reference to God. If you are right and I am wrong, I can live with that.  I have spent the majority of my life inviting people to be selfless, to be merciful and forgiving, to be good stewards of our blessings, to help those in need, to respect the integrity and  dignity of every human person..even though at times I can fail to live up fully to that.  If you are rightI wont' be cognizant to realize it anyway and thus have no regrets.  I have a joyful and fulfilled life even though I will never be wealthy, powerful, or indulge in certain pleasures.  I have that same calm and peace my dad had and I see it as the most precious part of his inheritance and example for me and my siblings.  However, if I am right, then I have lived a life that has told God my desire for heaven and union with Him and you have rejected him.  All judgment amounts to is a verification of our own free choice.  God condemns no one to hell, it is a personal choice each person makes.  Truth be told, I would just as soon have you on my side.  Yes there are things in the created order that bring sickness, suffering and death...but we were not created to just be here...here is transitory at best.  If God has indeed given us a part that will transcend time and space (the soul), my ultimate hope and peace lies there.  That is why when my dad whom I loved a great deal passed from this life, I had no sense of loss or any sense of overwhelming grief, ( I did cry profusely as I spoke my good-bye, my promise to carry on the heritage he wanted to pass on to me and my siblings and his grandchildren and ask for his help), the legacy of faith my dad left filled that moment with intense calm and peace.

At his funeral this coming week, it will be celebration of my dad and his deep felt and well justified faith in God.  Dad suffered greatly and had his long Good Friday...now is the time to celebrate his share in Easter.
The closing song of my dad's funeral mass will proclaim his belief, my belief,  and the belief of every faith filled Christian:

Sing with all the saints in glory,

sing the resurrection son!

death and sorrow, earth's dark story

to former days belong!

All around the clouds are breaking

soon the storms of time shall cease.

In God's likeness we, awaking,

know the everlasting peace!

 

He is at peace...so I am at peace

Yesterday afternoon, my dad had a massive heart attack and passed away quietly and peacefully later that night.  It was sudden.  He had celebrated his 72nd birthday the day before and was in great spirits.  Truth be told, he usually was anyway.  In his final months, he had been severely hampered by Parkinsons.  Despite the lack of ambulation, the falls, and even the difficulty in feeding himself, he was always pleasant.  That disposition came from his profound faith. Even as he passed from this life, his faith led him.  There was no drama, no complaining, and no fear.  He died in peace.  He desperately  wanted to be united to God for eternity and last night he got that desire.  He is at peace, so I am at peace.

As a man of faith myself, a faith modeled by my dad, I feel a calm.  Dad was ready.  Not because of any last minute panic about needing to get his affairs in order, but because he lived the gospel day in and day out.  He proudly belonged to Christ.  Christ tells us that those who are unashamed of Him before others, He will be unashamed of before the Father.  He was not a perfect man and would correct me for saying otherwise.  He didn't see himself as a finished product just coasting through this life waiting for his entitled award, but as a pilgrim needing God's grace as he awaited the Promised Land.

The effect it has on me it that such a witness makes me want to be a better person, a better man, a better priest, and a better follower of Christ.  Tomorrow we  start the season of Advent, a time in which we look ahead to the fulfillment of all desires and promises of was Christ says lays ahead for those who are ready.  It is a truly blest moment to witness someone who was ready and was able to look to that moment with hope and not fear.  We do not get time back.  The games we play and the bets we hedge rob us of hope.  I know Jesus Christ reigns and loves us.  I have no doubt about that.  I know that I need to be ready.

I want for each and everyone of you that same blessing I saw in my dad.  The calm, the hope, the faith, and the powerful witness. Anyone who authentically lives the Christian faith finds that...dad did.  May the same be for you and me.

Reversing roles...a new role for me

Recently, I have had a new element thrust it's way into my daily life.  I would never consider it an intrusion or unwelcome element at all.  My dad, whose health has been precarious as of late, has moved up to where I am stationed.  This seems to be a long term deal.  Right now, he is in the rectory and will be as we secure permanent housing and when I feel secure that he can live on his own.  I will admit, that for the first few days I have felt a bit overwhelmed by this and carrying my normal schedule as a pastor and priest.  I started praying about it and reflecting upon it and trying to avoid becoming a whiner about it.  I know my dad deserves better and so does my parish.

I am blessed to come from a family where we take care of our own.  My mom became a primary caretaker for both of her parents when they became old and started to grow weak and sick, even turning her dining room into my grandmother's bedroom in my grandmother's last days.  My dad took early retirement from a job he loved and moved halfway across the country to take care of his parents when they grew sick and elderly.  He took care of them for years.  Both of my parents set wonderful examples and reminders that honoring your mother and father do not end when  the child leaves the home.  I consider it a privilege to continue the family tradition.

As I was starting to feel overwhelmed, it came to me in prayer that I am doing for my dad what he did for me as a child.  My dad worked long hours, many at jobs he disliked, to provide for our family.  He worked hard and every dime he had went to the family.  I remember as a young boy noticing that dad's clothes were threadbare a lot.  I didn't know what it meant.  I noticed that he waited till the kids had food before he took his own.  I didn't know what that meant either.  I do now.  He sacrificed for his family even if it meant denying himself in the process.  Dad did for decades.  Very rarely was it appreciated; in fact, more often than not, it was taken advantage of and presumed upon.  Of course, I can now view this from the vantage point of an adult.  From that same vantage point, I know I must show that same dedication that was shown to me.  He did all that work and came home.  He dealt with all the problems and joys of being a dad...running us to and fro...listening to our whining....watching out for us when we were sick. 

I cannot imagine this is going to be easy.  Where dad got to watch his work pay off in seeing his children grow, find careers, find spouses, have their own families, I will watch as dad starts the slow decline as he prepares for eternal life.  That's okay.  I am blessed with a position that will allow me to do this, with a parish that has already shown its support to me and my dad, an understanding bishop, a good network of friends to support me , and a God who I know will give whatever is necessary to live up to the challenge presented.  I really do feel privileged as his son  and as a priest to step into this role.  Pray for me and my dad...and all my family as well...as we embark on this new course in our lives.  

Of Faith and Politics

* as a cleric of the Catholic Church, it is not my duty nor obligation to adhere to nor promote any political party.  In fact, I am forbidden to do so.  I am not a member of any party and have no allegiance to any party.


Politics.  Who governs?  By what philosophy?  By what set of standards?  We live in a republic, which means  we vote for those who make the laws and decisions that govern us as a people.  The people of this country come from various socio-economic states, various religions or types of faith (or lack thereof), from both genders, various races, sexual identities, regions, cultural backgrounds, and a myriad of other factors.  Laws and governance must apply equally to all groups who make up the tapestry that is our country.  Every single person who enters a voting booth enters with a set of convictions, self  interests, and desires and votes accordingly.  Over the entirety of this American experience, political parties have been a reality and have relied in cobbling together various subsets of these aforementioned groups to get elected.  As time progressed, these subsets were encouraged to see the other groups as threats to their own wants and consequently as the enemy.  This has not been good for this country at any part of our history and is now particularly divisive in our own time largely thanks to the overwhelming amount of information, disinformation, propaganda, and deceit available 24/7 from the media, internet, and political campaigns.  It is difficult to sort the truth from the lies and thus easy to hide within the fold of a political party.

We all approach the world and its realities from a certain viewpoint.  I am a Catholic.  This does not mean that I am a Catholic as opposed to anything else, but my starting point in making decisions, moral and otherwise, starts from the premise of the Catholic faith.  This is not saying I always act in conjunction with that faith (my confessor could inform that I do not always do so), but even when I choose against it, I know I am choosing against it and that if I value it, then I needs to make amends.  My Catholic faith informs all of my relationships, be it with family, friends, strangers, fellow Catholics, those who are not Catholic, those who do or do not belong to the same demographic subsets I belong to, with the poor, the wealthy, the believer, the non-believer.  It affects how I act, how I choose, and how I vote.

How does this affect me when it comes to be a citizen of this country?  First, the Gospel demands that I love all people.  It reminds me that I am my brother's keeper in the widest possible sense of that belief.  For me, that means that I loathe antagonistic relationships.  I do not need enemies.  I do not want to have enemies.  I realize that holding what I believe seriously might accrue enemies, but I am not purposely seeking them.  The gospel does not say that my duty to love stops when the other person is of a different race, creed, political party, economic status, orientation, culture, birth status, and such.  That duty transcends all of these other factors.  I have a moral obligation to defend and provide for those in danger and need.  When I vote, I bring these principles into the booth with me.  I must.  For if I abandon or compromise those principles at any point, they cease to have validity.  That means when I enter that booth, I am not voting for what is best for me, best for whatever demographic subsets I belong to; I vote for what is in the best interest of this country and humanity  as a whole.  This means I have a hierarchy of criteria that informs my vote.  No party is entitled to that vote. 

Given my criteria comes from that Gospel viewpoint, what should be the first criteria?  The command to love one another.  The Bible always puts a premium on the love those most in need; those who cannot provide for themselves.  At the top of this group should be those who are least able to do so.  That group would be the unborn.  A child in the womb cannot do anything for itself.  It can not speak up in its own defense. It cannot defend itself physically.  It cannot escape harm directed at it.  It is the very paradigm of helplessness.  As whatever you wish to call that which resides within the womb is both human and life, it is owed our love and protection.  Any group or party that condones the destruction of this most helpless form of human life as a mere choice says much to me about their general beliefs about the dignity of human life.  These people will never garner my vote...ever.  If I am true to my catholic principles, they must not.  How the most helpless of our society are treated will always be my first criteria.

That child's life does not end upon birth.  For the rest of its life, that child, as its grows into adulthood, will need help, education, food, clothing, a stable family, and the opportunity to freely follow its convictions and faith.  Those children will need security, love, compassion, patience, help when they fail, and the tools to succeed.  We can have fair debates on how this is accomplished.  No single political philosophy has the totality of the answers, usually the answer lies in an amalgamation of the best of these political philosophies.  As a Catholic, the command to love and the wish of Christ that we be one, leads me to want to seek out where those answer lie.  I know that catholic teaching can only be proposed and not imposed; but propose I must.  These words must be followed up by example.  My obligation to those in need is not something to is farmed out to another entity, but one in which I must personally engage.  This is why, for example, that Catholics have a myriad of institutions to do these things: hospitals and clinics, schools, charitable organizations, religious orders, and parishes.  This is why I as a pastor have been insistent that we look out for those in need within our parish and larger community. This is why I am so grateful to those in the Friends of St Martha who have attended to the needs of our own parishioners in crisis through various ways.  This is why I am grateful for the tons of food we have given to the Hope Center to help feed our local poor.  This is why I am grateful for the thousands of dollars we have given to those in need, those who need financial assistance both here and abroad.  But we know that such help can only be temporary.  The best answer to a person in need is to provide the situation for them to no longer need.  For those whose mental and  physical condition makes long term help necessary, we should be there.  As a Catholic, this is the next criteria I bring to the table.

The point is that as a Catholic, my faith requires me to look out first for those around me in imitation of Christ.  It effects everything.  No exceptions.  My life is an integrated whole...not a compartmentalized dyspeptic myriad of subsections.  My faith cannot be a hobby engaged upon when convenient.  My faith cannot be divorced from public avenues of my life.  I cannot nor will not be told that I must treat faith as something inferior to secular thought.  I respect the right of those of varied positions to bring what they think and believe to the table.  If I am really Catholic, that is what I bring to the table.  My Catholicism influences all my other ways of thinking, acting, relating, and being moral.  My politics do not influence my Catholicism.  My Catholicism influences my politics. While I do understand about the rendering to Caesar what is Caesar's and what is God's unto God...as a Catholic, I will never allow Caesar or anything else of this world to trump God. 

Everything I Thought I Knew, I Didn't: Reflections on 15 Years of Priesthood

Today I celebrate 15 years of ordination.  I am celebrating it!  As I look back on the last 15 years of being a Catholic priest, I look at one heck of a journey.  There have been extraordinary highs and gut wrenching lows.  The seminary did the best it could to prepare me with a base of knowledge, spirituality, and human formation to help me meet the road as it unfolded over the years. To be honest, I came out of the seminary all wild eyed and ready to proclaim, serve, and restore.  I came in with a profound ( or so I thought at the time) desire to serve.  I thought I knew it all and what the people wanted.  I thought. It is not that I was horribly wrong or off base, it is just that I had no idea of the magnitude  of what lay ahead.  Thankfully, God has always moved my heart to engage Him and His people and to keep trying to adapt without losing anything of a true Catholic priestly identity.  That openness has lead to a wealth of epiphany moments.  I wish to share some of the bigger ones.

1: What I actually know about God, faith, and Catholicism is little.  It is not through lack of trying.  I am a rather well read person who always believes there is always more that I can and need to learn.  Content wise, I probably do know more than the average person, but is like being a scientist, the more you study the more we know how little we know.  It is a given that we simply cannot come to know everything about God; we struggle with just the tidbit He gives us through Divine Revelation. 15 years of preaching on the Scriptures almost everyday and I still am amazed at how many layers there are and how much more there is just on the surface.  15 years and I have yet to grow tired of preaching and studying the Scriptures because it is like a multi-faceted gem with an infinite numbers of sides; each begging to be examined and integrated.  The depths and power of faith, I have come to find out, will go as deep as we allow them. Because it is based in God, the experience of faith and grace is boundless.  The more I experience, the more I know that is still left unexamined.  The depths of the theology, philosophy, logic, and wisdom present in Church teachings is profound.  Some of the greatest minds of history help in reflecting upon Christ and what the Christ event fully means.  I am a smart guy, but I am not St. Augustine, St. Thomas Aquinas, St. John Chrysostom, or any of the other great minds that have populated our teaching landscape.  I read the writings of the great Fathers and mystics and realize just how little I know.  I like to think that my desire to keep knowing and delving deeper into the mysteries of the faith is pleasing to God.  It is a lifetime endeavor.  It is a perpetual challenge.

2: The People of God don't need another Savior.  We already have one.  The Catholic Church existed long before I became a priest and will be here long after I depart from this life. My role is to point to THE Savior.  I have found out that this is far from easy.  It is more than using the right sequence of words, it is by living a correct example.  That is difficult for me.  I think the easiest trap for any cleric to fall into is that trap of hypocrisy.  It is easy to preach love, mercy, forgiveness, patience, love of God and love of neighbor; it is much harder to live, especially knowing that my parishioners have the right to be able to see me living that example.  It has meant that I have had to wildly reign in my temper, a temper that has gotten me into much trouble.  The first time I lost my patience with a parishioner, it hit me after I was done of the potentially devastating effect of the Roman Collar.  I became aware that when I lost my patience, it just wasn't me as a person, but it came across as the entirety of the Roman catholic Church, if not Christ Himself, coming down on the person.  I shudder to think how many people I might well have driven away, how many vocations I might have crushed, how many good souls were rightfully scandalized.  I look back at those 2 or 3 incidents and still feel deep regret and sorrow.  As I have grown, my temperament has settled and my anger is usually saved for people who cut me off in traffic (and yes, I know I must work on that as well).

3: I am called 'Father' for a reason.  This realization has grown so much stronger over the past few years.  When we started Camp Maccabee some years back, it was with the understanding that all the same things needed to be a good dad and husband were also needed to be a good priest.  Archbishop Flynn told me that in a one on one conference during a retreat my 1st year in theology.  that conversation was probably one of the most significant of my life.  It took me almost 20 years to unpack that.  My role in a parish is that of a father.  It is my duty to provide from the wealth of our faith and to lead others into a deeper relationship with the God who entrusted me with their care.  The same can be said of dads and their children.  It is my duty to nurture and maintain union built upon stewardship and selflessness, so that each member of the parish knows they are loved, wanted, and needed as part of this parish family.  I use the term 'parish family' not in some sappy sense of forced fellowship of people who would otherwise have no connection, but in the same dynamic that Christ did when He used  familial terms to describe the relationship He has with us, we have with the Father, and that we have with each other.  It is not my job to dominate.  It seems it would  be easier if I tried that, but I know it would undo everything and drive off wide swaths of the family entrusted to my pastoral care.  It is a constant source for internal dialogue and external whining.  I know that I am far from being that ideal father.

4: The people don't need to know what I think, they need to know the truth.  So many times people have been confused because clerics have come down like Moses from Mt Sinai with their own slant or opinion on the teachings of the Church.  It creates great confusion and invites division.  My opinion saves no one.  My opinion is not synonymous with Divine Revelation.  My opinion can dilute the Gospel.  I will be held responsible for that.  I am well aware of that.  In fact, it frightens me.  One of my pet peeves is being lied to because when I am lied to, I can not make reasonable or correct decisions; it is hard to build decisions on a lie.  If I dilute the Gospel, I present a deceit and force other people who may not know better to build decisions on those deceits.  The reason I read so much is because I want to be as sure as I can that I am presenting the truth and giving those entrusted to my care a solid foundation.  Sometimes the truth can be challenging and provoking. In fact, the vast majority of the time it is.  The truth always provokes us to a deeper and greater relationship with God and with one another.  The truth challenges our bad habits and favorite sins.  I cannot tell people a deceit in hopes of not hurting their feelings,  or not making them angry with me, or in hopes of not losing money in the collection.  It is hard and the temptation to take the easy road and say what people want to hear (or what I want to hear) it ever-present.

5:  I wouldn't give this up for anything.  Even in the incredibly dark days of 2002 when the sex scandals broke and priests that I not only knew, but admired as well, I had no intention of leaving.  There were days when I was weary.  There still are.  There are still days of great frustration, but isn't that true for everyone? However, those days are greatly outnumbered by the great days, the powerful days, and the truly spiritual days.  The schedule can be grueling.  Being constantly in an unwanted spotlight is aggravating at times. I still get nervous preaching and teaching.  I still feel somewhat inadequate in some of my pastoral duties.  I am okay with that in that I have only been doing this for 15 years.  I know that I am far from the perfect priest and perfect pastor; I still have much to learn and much to grow.  I am not a finished product.  That said, I can say I have tried my best most of the time.  I sincerely hope that as time passes that I will progress deeper and become a better pastor.  Despite every struggle that I have faced, am facing, and will face, I love the challenge that being a priest in this society.  I love that I have to keep my own weaknesses in check with God's grace.  I love that I have learned much and still have much to learn.  I love that there will be never a reason for me to grow cold or apathetic.  I am interested in what the next 15 years bring, what I will learn, how I will develop, and how I can better be what God has called and created me to be.    I am okay with the fact that I will never grow wealthy by earthly standards.  I am okay with the fact that this society will probably never respect me.  I am okay with knowing that if I am a good priest there will be much sacrifice that lays ahead.  I look forward to the future and I am happy in the present.  the best thing that I have learned is that God is ever generous with His grace and mercy with anyone who willing to at least try to rise to the challenge of the Gospel.  Here's to many more years of learning. growing, and deepening.

It is only just religion

    The above statement is one that we hear too many times in society.  It is the times that it goes left unsaid but is acted upon that is really disheartening.  “It’s just religion, or faith, or church” is born from an understanding that matters of spirituality are to be easy, enabling, and unobtrusive in our lives.  Faith, especially the study and practice thereof, are regulated to a low priority.  It is a co-opting of  the culture in which we live that marginalizes faith altogether; a culture that Dr. Stephen Carter called “The Culture of Disbelief” .  This culture has thrown God out of our public institutions.  God is not allowed in our public schools.  He is not allowed in the public square.  This has gone on for so long that most Americans have also pushed Him out of their lives.  What happens?  We get the gratingly inane “I am not religious, I’m spiritual” (aka : “I do what I want and God will have to just rubber stamp it…I don’t take orders from God or some church…I give them“) Take a look at what is happening in our country.  Watch it crumbling.  It is nothing new.  In the Old Testament, Israel rotted from within as it pushed God to the periphery. They relied on their wealth and power (sound familiar?) and pushed God’s protecting hand aside.  Without that protection, they fell apart, were crushed by their enemies, and all the power and wealth in the world could not save them.  We are on that same path.  Did our power and military might spare us 9/11 or the two subsequent wars that happened as a result?  Did our wealth stave off this prolonged recession?  Push God away and we push His protection away!

    What is true in the macrocosm of society is equally as true in the microcosm of our parish and our families.  Our pursuit of the secular has practically wiped out the pursuit of the eternal.  All too often the pursuit of the eternal is regulated to one hour (or shorter) on Sunday.  That is only if something else doesn’t crowd it out.  Education?  That’s another subject altogether.  If we think that 4-5 hours of religion class, IF the child goes to Catholic school, and 1 hour if they don’t, suffices for their training, then we are fooling ourselves and essentially answering a good part of the reason why  our youth lose interest and wander away in disturbingly large numbers.  It’s hard to have a deep abiding relationship with someone you barely know.  Is there any parent who believes 1 hour of science a week suffices to help their child?  How about 1 hour of math?  How about one hour of spelling?  Or English? Or History?  How then, is one hour in class enough when it comes to the teachings of our faith?  Of course not!  Let me go one step further.  Religion ’class’ is not like other classes.  In the other classes, we are not giving them information so that they can have a personal relationship with math, science, or any of the other disciplines. In religion class, or PSR, or confirmation ‘class’ we are more about telling them how God has revealed Himself over the ages so that He might be known, served, and loved at least to some degree to which He knows, serves, and loves us.  In all of these ‘classes’ we are dispensing knowledge so as to lead to a relationship with God.  Just because ‘it’s only religion’ does not mean we can give it a minimal effort.

    Our Christian development and education do not end once we have ceased ‘classes’.  If they do, then we can expect nothing but a minimalist attitude towards faith and the application of faith to our daily lives and on how we set priorities in our lives.  “It’s only religion”. whether spoken or unspoken, will lead to an eventual turning away from the faith.  We cannot reject that relationship with God here and now and expect that somehow all will be just peachy in the afterlife. 

    So what does this mean?  Let us start with what is the parish’s responsibility.  The parish has a responsibility to provide the material, the teachers, the time, the space to help parents teach their children how to develop that relationship with God.  The parish has a responsibility to make sure the materials and solid and truthful.  It is our job to provide opportunities.  However, as I said during the homily on Good Shepherd Sunday , while it is my responsibility to make sure that the fields the flock are nourishing from are the fields of the Lord, I cannot make anyone attend anything.  You have to want it because you recognize the necessity for a deep abiding relationship with God and the equally pressing need to pass on that same fire to your children.  We have provided classes for our youth in both the parochial and public schools (in which under the best of circumstances we can only show them the tip of the iceberg), for our high school students in confirmation. 

    We tried  to provide classes for our Freshman and Seniors.   Both failed because of lack of participation from the youth who had other things to do.  I have provided most Wednesdays to have adult education.  I used top notch programs and books.  I am no slouch as a teacher.  The response was minimal at best.  I am offering a bible study using, again, top notch material.  21 people out of 400+ families we have this parish signed up.  Am I to believe that the other 400+ families are biblical experts who know the Bible so well and are able to defend their faith so well that they do not need help?  We brought in one of the foremost speakers on evangelization this Spring when Patrick Madrid came in.  Fewer than 80 parishioners showed.  Am I to believe that all the others know their faith so well and are so practiced at evangelization that they didn’t need help?  We have a well stocked parish library by the women’s restroom in the back of Church, it has been there for over a year.  I have stocked it with solid materials, surrendering hundreds of books from my private library, all in the hopes of providing educational resources for my parishioners.  I have repeatedly spoke about the opportunities we have in the diocese for our youth to spend a week coming to know that relationship with God better. The same goes for the Mission trip.  The response has been underwhelming. If it seems I am complaining a bit, I am.  It seems like there is always something else to do…some class…some sport…some practice…some game…something else that is more important on the food chain of our lives.  We are trying to live up to our responsibilities to provide both material and opportunity.  This is a common problem in all parishes!

What is your responsibility?  To respond positively.  To admit that we need help in understanding.  To purge this horrid ‘it’s just religion’ when it comes to how we respond, how our youth respond, and each sets their hierarchy of priorities. After all, it isn’t just religion, it’s our eternal relationship with God in the balance.  Relationships take time and effort, they challenge to change for the better.  If God doesn’t say ‘it’s only humanity’ when it comes to us, how can we say ‘it’s only religion’ when it comes to Him

I Assume it will continue: Parents and Catholic Formation of Youth

 I Assume It Will Continue

This week school ends for the summer.  Our students will hopefully spend more time with their first and best teachers of the ways of the faith: their parents.  There are values and matters of faith that we have tried to instill so as to help parents build more on the foundations they set with their children.  It is my expectation as a pastor that those lessons of faith continue to be practiced:

1) In this school, we have taught your students the centrality of the Eucharist in the identity of a Catholic.  We have had mass most weeks 3 times with your child.  In those masses, I have spent hours teaching your children the basics of the Catholic faith and how those teachings concretely apply towards how they live.  While I do not expect that they will continue to come to weekday mass, it is my expectation that they do on Sundays and Holy Days as per the teachings of the Church.  We had, most months, time for your children to pray in front of the Blessed Sacrament in Adoration, again to stress the importance and centrality of the Eucharist in our lives.  We do have an Eucharistic Adoration chapel where you as a parent can continue this work and bring your child before Christ in the Blessed Sacrament at your convenience.  I assume that they preeminence of the Eucharist in your child’s life will continue to be taught and modeled by your own behavior.

2) In this school, we have taught them the importance of the Sacrament of Reconciliation and its central role in maintaining a healthy Catholic identity.  Most months, we had time set aside for your child to go to Confession so that their spiritual lives might be continually bolstered by the grace of God.  I will assume that these lessons and the practice thereof will be continued to be taught and modeled by those who promised to do so when they willingly brought their child to be baptized.  I will assume that the life of repentance and grace will continue.

3) In this school, we have taught your child the importance of prayer.  The day is speckled with prayer in the individual classrooms, together as a student body, and in the already aforementioned times provided for your child to pray.  Prayer is also part of that central core of catholic identity.  It is my assumption that parents will continue this by praying together as a family and encouraging their children to a deeper prayer life and practice of the faith.

4) In this school, we have taught your children the importance of a devotion to the Blessed Mother and in following her example of faith.  Your child prayed the Angelus after lunch everyday.  Your child prayed the rosary.  These are among the ways we tried to teach and model this central aspect of Catholic identity.  I can only assume that their primary teachers, the parents, will live up to the responsibility they took upon themselves at their child’s baptism.

5) The teachings of the Church we have taught in their religion classes.  It should not be limited to there.  It is primarily the parents duty to teach these things as they do teach other parts of the identity that children have.  We have a large parish library.  I am investing a good chunk of this parish’s money in expanding that library to now include books aimed at children and teens; books about the lives of the saints and how to be a better Catholic.  I will be teaching a 24 part series on the Sacred Scriptures every Wednesday through the summer.  We are offering Vacation Bible School, a youth mission trip, Christpower, Camp Maccabee, Camp Siena as ways of bolstering the lessons learned in the classroom.  I can only assume, again, that those parents who have taken the responsibility of raising their children in the ways of the faith, as they said they would during their child’s baptism, will joyfully make use of these things to bolster their child’s faith and make it a priority, not allowing other pursuits (some worthy, some not) to crowd out such time and effort.  I can only assume that those parents for whom Catholic identity is important will joyfully make use of these things for themselves in order to help them become better teachers and help their children become better Catholics.

5) In this school and other education programs we have taught them the importance of selfless service.  Anyone who heard me preach more than for 5 seconds knows that I place a premium on such service as it shows an imitation of the life of Jesus Christ.  I can only assume that parents will bolster this life of selfless Christian service by the volunteering they do both within the parish and with other charitable entities.

Please do not think I am being too forward with assuming all this or that this a poor attempt at sarcasm or complaint.  We do what we do in education systems to bolster the religious training that is started and modeled within the family.  I understand the Church’s teachings on the nature of the Church and what she has to say about its most basic building block, the domestic church, also known as the family.

Several weeks back I reminded parents that they have the God given responsibility of being shepherds who lead those entrusted by God to them in the ways of the Good Shepherd.  Parents should be at least as  attentive to the spiritual development of those placed in their care as they are the academic and physical development of their child.  If it seems I am being pushy about this, I am.  The stakes are far too high, both in this life and in the life to come, for the spiritual development of our youth not to be the priority it needs to be.  I can promise you I will continue to be insistent on this matter.

  The development of our youth into the next group of shepherds is a high priority for me.  It needs to be an high priority for all have the role of shepherd for the next generation.  The elements of prayer, education, service, and sacramental involvement are all necessary to produce not just shepherds, but good shepherds.  As I told the kids at the last school Mass of the year:  They are taking a few months off from school, not their faith.